Compromising Positions

Him: UGH

Him: GOD DAMIT

Him: U AND UR KIDS

Her: lol

Him: THATS WHAT YOU GET FOR BEING A SLUT

Her: LOL

Her: let's be real. you're the real slut

Him: ala

Him: i don't have a vagina

Her: ohh so that's what makes a slut?

Her: LMAO

Him: a slut is a girl who opens her legs for all to fuck

Him: or

Him: it could be a girl who opens her mouth to for all to insert

Her: wow

Her: lol

Him: ?

Her: what about you? your butt has been penetrated more that god knows

Her: than*

Him: umm i've penetrated butt but my butt is an exit hole only

Her: Ew you've penetrated butt?

Him: i've penetrated butt in general

Him: not mine

Him: except that one time i felt extra kinky

Her: ha...how many "girls" have you BF'd

Him: i've fucked two in the butt

Him: and i've tossed one salad

Her: YUCK

Her: *smells imaginary shit*

Him: it tastes better

Her: like..who comes up with the idea to do it in the butt?

Her: you or them

Him: i hate butt secks

Him: it hurts my penis

Him: they like it

Him: keep in mind i can still count all my partners in my life on one hand

Her: ha

Her: i wasn't doubting that

Her: ha

Her: Fuck butt, i'd never do it lmao

Him: well u can't cuz u got no pp

Him: i personally hate it

Him: it's a rough job but sometimes it has to be done

Him: sometimes if we're doing missionary i have trouble finding the hole

Him: thats why im a doggy fan

Her: lmao

Her: so gross

Him: and occasionally i stick it in the wrong hole

Her: ewww

Him: ur telling me

Him: it's like dipping an ice cream cone in chocolate

Her: LMAO

Her: yuckkk

Him: yeah

Him: this one time

Him: i pulled it out

Him: and she started sucking it

Him: i was like EWW

Her: ass to mouthhhh

Her: say it isn't so

Him: um yeah i guess

Her: that's freakin sick dude

Him: but some girls love ass fuck

Her: Yeah i'm sure there is...

Him: i made a girl have like 4 orgasms in like 15 minutes

Her: ouchh

Him: i guess its just because tree trunks are better fit for the ass

Her: tree trunks? or branches?

Him: nono i'm wide

Him: more like a trunk stub

Her: YUCKKKKK

Her: i DID NOT want that visual

Him: it's a tough job

Him: try squeezing something the size of a coke can into a hole the size of a dime

Him: or a quarter

Him: lmao

Him: i bet she has to wear depends after that

Him: "it's diaper time"

Her: LOL